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2024

Did someone pull a fire alarm after Florida State's loss? 7 suspects we want to hear from

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There’s no denying things are bad at Florida State right now.

The team is 0-3. The fans look absolutely miserable. The play on the field looks even worse. After Saturday’s loss to Memphis, FSU became the first FBS school to clinch the under on it’s season win total line of 9.5.

But if you were hoping for any accountability or explanations of the debacle against the Tigers from head coach Mike Norvell, that’s not going to happen.

Not because Norvell didn’t show for his postgame press conference, but because the fire alarm went off in the middle of it, forcing everyone to clear the building.

Apt metaphor for the temperature of Norvell’s seat aside, it sure seems like there a number of people around FSU who would prefer no one ask any questions about the state of the program.

Now, we’re not saying the alarm was pulled on purpose under fraudulent circumstances. It would be highly inappropriate to suggest such a thing. But if that were the case, these suspects would be at the top of the list:

  1. Florida State Athletic Director Michael Alford
  2. ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit — though he’s got a pretty good alibi after picking FSU to win today
  3. Florida State’s lawyers, who are trying to help the school escape the ACC because the rest of the league is holding the football team back(???)
  4. Mike Norvell, because you’ve always got to suspect the person at the center of any crime, and because no one wants to talk about this season less than him.
  5. Jameis Winston, on prior history in Tallahassee alone
  6. ACC Commissioner Jim Phillips, who has to at least be enjoying the chaos at FSU just a bit
  7. @321Nole — We still haven’t forgotten!