The top 20 parenting tips people would give their younger selves – number 17 will help anyone facing terrible twos
CHERISH the little moments, ask for help when you need it, and forgive mistakes are the top pearls of wisdom parents would offer to their younger selves.
A poll of 1,000 mums and dads with children aged one to 10 found 72% admitted they felt pressure to be “the perfect parent”.
According to the findings, 80% of respondents wish they had spent less time worrying about “doing everything right”.
Instead, they said they wished they had spent more time enjoying their child’s early years.
A further 80% wish they could remind their younger self to trust their instincts when it comes to parenting and not listen to other people’s opinions.
As 44% admitted they felt overwhelmed by other people’s advice often or very often, leading to confusion during their parenting journey.
It also emerged the top challenges parents faced during the early months and years of their baby’s life included sleep deprivation at 49% and finding time for self-care at 39%.
Learning to identify and understand their baby’s cues also received 30% of votes.
“Being a first-time parent is filled with joy and challenges, and it’s natural to wish we’d done a few things differently,” said Emma Wardhaugh spokesperson for Philips Avent Mother and Childcare.
Philps commissioned the research carried out via OnePoll.com.
“Many parents look back and wish they could reassure their younger selves that perfection is never the goal – what truly matters is being present and doing your best,” Emma continued.
“In the early days, it’s easy to get caught up in self-doubt and the pressure to have all the answers, but the reality is that no one has it all figured out from the start.
“Every child is different, and every parent grows into their role with time, support from their village, and patience.”
The study also found 39% struggled to find time for selfcare in the early years and months of their child’s life, with this figure being significantly higher for women at 47% than men at 30%.
When parents did take time for themselves, 44% felt selfish when doing so.
But 63% of those who took part in the study credited partners and their parents as their main support system in the early days of parenthood.
However, 62% said that they would ask for more help if they were to go through the parenting journey again.
Top 20 tips paretns would give their younger selves
1. You’ll make mistakes, and that’s okay
2. Don’t compare your child to others
3. Cherish “the little moments”
4. Laugh often with your kids
5. Teach them kindness by example
6. Cherish the hugs and kisses
7. Ask for help when you need it
8. Take lots of photos and videos
9. You don’t have to be perfect
10. Say “I love you” every day
11. It’s OK to cry sometimes
12. Celebrate the little milestones, yours and theirs
13. Spend less time worrying, more time loving
14. Make time for yourself (self-care isn’t selfish)
15. Trust your instincts
16. Slow down and enjoy the journey
17. Remember, this phase won’t last forever
18. Give yourself grace on hard days
19. Let them be little
20. Document your child’s firsts
It also emerged half of all parents had babies that struggled with colic and reflux issues.
And 24% of these felt they weren’t well supported through the problem, while 26% didn’t feel confident in understanding the causes and treatments for colic and reflux.
“Parenting is a role that demands so much, and it’s ok to ask for help and give yourself grace,” Emma said.
“It’s a learning process, but no parent should feel they have to carry everything alone.
“Looking back, many realise that it’s important to take time for themselves and count on their village to support them through the early days and years of their child’s life.”