28 Funny Tweets About What Kids Say They're Going To Be When They Grow Up
Despite the fact that most adults haven’t quite figured out this one yet, most of them seem to have no qualms about asking a child what they want to be when they grow up — and expecting an immediate, coherent answer
Luckily, kids have a way of stealing the show with their replies to this inquiry, or other thoughts about their own distant future.
Here, some grown-ups on X (formerly Twitter) share a number of memorable things kids have said about what they’re going to be when they grow up.
I empower my child to be whatever & whoever she wants. Right now,she wants to be an astronaut when she grows up. When I tell her what she needs to do in order to become an astronaut, I start with the basics. Step 1: LEARN TO PEE & POOP ON THE POTTY. MOMMY IS TIRED OF CHANGING YOU
— Marissa ???????????? (@michimama75) November 3, 2019
My daughter told me that she thinks it’d be more fun to have a puppy than a boyfriend when she grows up and she’s not wrong
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) September 21, 2023
My 6-year-old said when she grows up she wants to be a "chainsaw guy."
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) June 9, 2022
Not sure if she means a professional tree trimmer like the ones working across the street or a serial killer in a hockey mask, but girls can do it all.
3yo used to say he wanted to be a “please officer” when he grows up, thanks to a cop-obsessed Big Kid™️ on our street. but then we started doing enough ice cream dates that just now, when an elder asked him what he’s going to be he closed his eyes and whispered: “a Dairy Queen”
— hannahmatthews on ???? blsky (@hannahmsays) July 17, 2024
Asked my son what he wanted to be when he grew up
— Aditi Parekh (@aditipar) November 22, 2024
With clear eyed conviction, he said
SENIOR MANAGEMENT
8YO: When I grow up I don’t ever want to be a teacher
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) May 9, 2023
Me: why?
8YO: I can’t deal with so many parents talking
Kid: When I grow up, my bff and I aren’t having kids and then we can go out any time and do adult things.
— krista pacion (@kristabellerina) October 12, 2024
Me: Umm, what do you mean by doing “adult things”?
Kid: Go to pubs.
Whew.
5 & 7 listening to one of my calls this morning.
— Shematologist, MD (@acweyand) January 26, 2022
5: Mom, what’s heavy monster bleeding?
I explain menstruation.
5: I want to be a boy when I grow up.
New spider man movie so good deuce told me
— Jayson Tatum (@jaytatum0) June 8, 2023
“ daddy I think I changed my mind I might want to be spider man when I grow up… but I still want to be you”
Good save son, good save!
5yo; “Mommy, I think when I grow up, I might change my name to a grownup name because my name is a little kid’s name. Maybe I’ll use my middle name. My name is such a baby name! I want a grown up name when I’m a grown up.”
— Stephanie Insley Hershinow (@S_Insley_H) May 3, 2023
Reader, his name is HARVEY.
My toddler said she wants to be a firefighter (noble choice) when she grows up because she “really loves fire” (uh oh).
— The Dad (@thedad) May 5, 2023
I asked my daughter what she wants to be when she grows up. She got super serious and replied, “Oh that’s easy. I’m going to be the Queen.” Mood. Goals. AF.
— Maryfairyboberry????????♀️ (@maryfairybobrry) August 5, 2019
I forgot to tell ya I asked my son last night what he wanted to be when he grows up he said “mom I want to be an avenger “ I told him avengers aren’t real it’s a costume....he said “oh like when you put your wig on like a Halloween costume...” I just ...
— U. (@uniqueblessed) March 22, 2021
I just asked my 3 year-old if she’s gonna be a comedian or lawyer when she grows up because she already got a smart mouth. And she responds, “No I want to be a President.” Holy shit ????????????????????????
— Meena Harris (@meena) September 6, 2019
me: how was gymnastics dude?
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) October 11, 2024
9: fine but there's an annoying kid. Even the coach can't stand him. I wanna punch him but I know if I do I'll be banned
me: correct
9: well when we grow up into adults I'm gonna find him and punch him really hard.
and there is his villain…
3yo: Mommy, I want to be the Big, Bad Wolf when I grow up.
— 3 Wild Rainbows (@wildrainbow2) October 13, 2022
Me: Um....ok.....
Asked a preschooler at my niece's birthday party, "What are you gonna be when you grow up?" And she looked me and said, "A grown-up."
— Caitlin ???? ???? Driscoll (@TeacherOnTopic) October 12, 2024
When I grow up and get a baby I'm gonna be nice to it
— Marcy G (@BunAndLeggings) June 10, 2022
- My 5-year-old
My 5yo: WHEN I GROW UP I WANT TO BE A SINGER AND A DANCER AND A MUSICIAN AND A VETERINARIAN AND A PASTOR AND A TEACHER
— Courtney Ellis ???? (@courtneyellis) June 3, 2024
Me: Wow! You’d be so good at—
5: I WASN’T DONE
Pilot (to my 5-year-old daughter a few days ago): Do you know you could be a flight attendant when you grow up?
— Rebecca Papin (@RebeccaPapin) April 13, 2022
5: I could also own the plane.
me: what are you going to be when you grow up?
— Dan (@dadopotamus) July 6, 2023
5: beautiful.
Me: you can be anything you want!
— Emily ™ (@emily_tweets) November 18, 2021
4: Mommy. When I grow up, first I'm gonna be a mermaid, then I'm gonna be a pilot, then I'm gonna be a pony, then I'm gonna be a mom and then I'm gonna be a unicorn.
“When I grow up, I want to be a wolfer. Someone who feeds pizza to wolves.” -4, preparing for one hell of a future
— Marissa ???????????? (@michimama75) January 28, 2021
[3yo talking to me about what doctors do]
— 3 Wild Rainbows (@wildrainbow2) January 10, 2020
Me: Is that what you want to be when you grow up? A doctor?
3yo: *thinks for a minute* No, mommy, I'm just going to be a human being.
My daughter told me she wants to be a doctor when she grows up so she can take care of me when I’m an old lady
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) August 19, 2023
3yo says when she grows up she wants to be a scientist and a unicorn. To be fair, unicorn transformation is a very specific science.
— Lil Bit ???? (@LizerReal) September 17, 2020
8-year-old: I want to be like you when I grow up.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 24, 2023
Me: You want to write books?
8: I want to be tall and nap a lot.
Dream big.
Me: What are you going to be when you grow up?
— Shematologist, MD (@acweyand) October 14, 2021
6yo patient: Bigger.