5 Lies You’ve Grown Up Believing Because Of Toxic Humans
It takes effort to love you.
Toxic humans will make you feel like you’re unlovable, so they get credit for putting up with you. However, the right person won’t feel like you’re a burden. They won’t treat you like an inconvenience. They will make it clear that you’re special to them. You’re beautiful and sweet and strong. Toxic people try their hardest to destroy your self-esteem so you don’t leave them. It’s the only way they can convince you to stay because if you realized how wonderful you really are, you would never settle for their subpar love.
You should keep your feelings to yourself.
Toxic humans don’t want to deal with your emotions. Especially when you’re hurt by them or annoyed with them. They made you believe that bringing up your feelings is only going to start a fight – that they are going to win. No matter how much they hurt you, toxic humans will always find a way to minimize your experience and act like you’re overreacting. They will make you question your own worth and your own sanity, so they don’t have to take responsibility for their actions. But the truth is, your feelings are valid. Your thoughts matter and they deserve to be heard. The only reason this person is making you feel crazy is so you start questioning yourself instead of questioning them.
Screaming at you means that they care.
They might have convinced you that the only reason they get so overprotective and jealous is because they love you so damn much. But someone can love you and still respect you. They can love you and bring up problems without calling you horrible names and flinging nasty insults. Real love isn’t supposed to hurt this deeply. Real love isn’t always easy, but it’s always mature and respectful.
Love never lasts.
This person probably treated you well in the beginning, then slowly started to change their behavior. You might assume that this is normal, that all relationships change as time passes – but this is not okay. Relationships aren’t bound to disintegrate over the years. Remember, not everyone is going to act the same as this person who hurt you. There are good hearts out there who would never dream of putting you through pain. Don’t let yourself believe that leaving is pointless because any other relationship would end the same.
You don’t deserve someone better.
Your insecurities are lying to you, and so is this toxic human. They are counting on you to treat yourself like the enemy so you don’t gather up the courage to leave. They want you to feel like you’re worthless, but at the same time, they want you to feel like they’re the only one who sees the beauty in you. That way, you won’t even consider leaving them. However, you do deserve to be loved fully. You do deserve to feel safe and loved – and there are people out there who will help that happen. It’s better to be on your own than with someone who goes out of their way to hurt you. It’s better to start over than let them continue this same dangerous pattern.