I begged to be put into care after prostitute mum slept with men in my room… when I got there my life got even worse
A WOMAN who walked into a police station to place herself into care at the age of nine has revealed the horrific abuse she suffered during her years in the system.
Hope Daniels, now 50, was raised by alcoholic parents and her mother was a working prostitute. She would bring clients back to their home and into the bedroom she shared with Hope.
Hope and her siblings often went without food and their home was cold and filthy.
In desperation, aged nine, Hope took her siblings on the bus to Stoke Newington Police station from their home in Hackney, East London, and demanded to be taken in care.
She spent several happy years in a children’s home but, in her early teens, was moved to secure units where she suffered physical, mental and sexual abuse.
Aged 15, she was groomed by a man twice her age, who promised to marry her, plied her with alcohol, and forced her into having sex with him.
Shockingly, after the authorities discovered the incident they blamed Hope and moved her to foster care specialising in difficult teenagers where she felt treated like an outcast.
Thirty-five years on, Hope is a proud mum and gran and is an advocate for young people in care, working with health and education professionals across the UK.
Hope, a bestselling author, has written her forth book about her experiences: ‘This isn’t Love’, which was published in August.
Hope, from Southampton, says: “All my childhood, growing up, all I wanted was a family.
“I had some tough times, but my story has a happy ending; now I have the family I have always dreamed of, and I use my trauma to help other children.
“I want to be the voice for them that I never had.”
Hope was raised in Hackney, East London, with three siblings, where she had a rough start in life.
Hope says: “I had a single bed in my parents’ bedroom, and I remember her regularly bringing men into the bedroom.
“My dad was aware of what was happening, it wasn’t a secret, it was a way of bringing money in.
“I didn’t know what they were doing but I hated it.
“We were severely neglected but somehow, in the early 1970s, we just kept slipping through the net.
“There was rarely food in the house and I learned to shop-lift, like my dad, so that me and my younger brothers could eat.
“I got to know all the charity projects around Hackney, and we’d go for a meal or to get clothes.
“Aged nine, our house was smashed up by the neighbours who were protesting about my mum’s work, and there was broken glass everywhere.
“At this point, Mum was in prison and Dad was drinking heavily, he couldn’t cope with it.
“I knew this was a turning point. I took my little brothers on the bus to the local police station, I marched up to the desk and said: ‘I am not going home until you take us into care.’
“I was terrified, but something had to change.”
Hope spent three years in a children’s home but when her behaviour deteriorated, she was moved to a secure unit.
She says: “The staff were cruel.
I was so desperate to be normal, to have a family of my own
Hope Daniels
“I kept wetting myself, out of fear, and they would laugh at me and show everyone. I was made to wash my own bed sheets by hand.
“One night, they made me eat a kebab out of the bin, and it wasn’t just the other girls, the staff were watching as well.
“I kept trying to run away and each time they caught me, I was placed in isolation, literally a padded cell. I was only 13 years old. I was just a child.”
Aged 15, Hope was introduced to a man who was married to one of her former friends.
He began grooming her, encouraging her to abscond from the care home to stay with him in London.
After plying her with drink and drugs, he forced her to have sex with him.
Hope says: “I actually thought he was my boyfriend.
“I believed he’d marry me and felt so lucky that he’d picked me. I just didn’t think marriage and happiness happened to girls like me.
“I was so desperate to be normal, to have a family of my own, and I was grateful to him.”
When care staff discovered the ‘relationship’, Hope says they blamed her, accusing her of being a homewrecker.
She was quickly moved to a foster home where she was ostracised, made to eat separately, and use a secondary living room to the rest of the family.
She says: “The family living room had lovely furniture, and a nice telly.
“The foster kids’ living room had a portable TV which didn’t work, and it was filthy.
“We were given different food, often out of date. The flour was crawling with weevils. All the chocolate and sweets were locked away, for the family’s real children.
“I broke the lock and stole all the chocolate bars and shared them out amongst the foster kids. I couldn’t stand the injustice of it, even then.”
Aged 17, desperate to escape the system, Hope became pregnant on purpose.
She went on to have a daughter and son by the same partner before they split.
HOW TO REPORT CHILD ABUSE
Child abuse includes physical, sexual and emotional abuse, and neglect.
You can read more about the signs of child abuse.You don’t need to be sure that a child or young person has been abused – it’s OK to report a suspicion.
If you’re worried that a child or young person is at risk or is being abused contact the children’s social care team at their local council.
You’ll be asked for your details, but you can choose not to share them.
Call 999 if the child is at immediate risk.
If it’s not an emergency, you can report the crime online or call 101.
Calls to 999 or 101 are free.
Source: Gov.uk
Determined to make something of her life, she trained as a probation worker and became a committed advocate for young people in care.
Hope says: “It wasn’t easy raising children on my own, I had no role model, no family support.
“In many ways, I was too strict, I didn’t let them out of my sight because I was so afraid of them being abused.
“But I spoiled them too, I went overboard at Christmas and birthdays because I didn’t want them to suffer as I had. I used to buy so much food; my cupboards were overflowing.
“I have a wonderful relationship with my kids and grandkids, we’re so close, and that gives me the greatest pleasure.
“I’ve had battles with my mental health and my children have supported me through it all.”
Hope is now a freelance consultant, advising health, education and social care professionals, across the UK.
She has also rebuilt her relationship with her mother, who, she says, was as much of a victim as she was. Her father is deceased.
Hope received an apology from Lambeth council with reference to her time in the secure units.
Hope says: “Mum and I have come full circle. I understand she made mistakes, but I also understand she had a lot of problems herself.
“I can’t change the past, but I can move forwards with forgiveness.”
Hope’s book, This Isn’t Love, was released in August this year by Mirrorbooks and is available on Amazon.