I’m a size 16 – my slim friends are diet obsessed & miserable while I love devouring a curry and am happier than ever
MUM-OF-TWO Danielle Broadbent, 41, a size 16 radio presenter and body-positive coach from West Yorkshire, wishes her diet-obsessed friends would embrace their curves – just like she has . . .
PUTTING down the phone, I sighed in despair.
I had just called two of my best friends to see if they fancied dinner at our local Italian.
One accepted, but said she’s on a diet so would only have a starter.
The other suggested going for a walk instead, as she wants to slim down for a party.
Once again, my idea of a lovely, gossipy evening, sharing pizza and wine, had gone down like a lead . . . dough ball.
My friends are amazing, but their constant dieting can be so frustrating.
Most are a size 10 or 12 and far slimmer than me, but some have to work so hard to keep trim that the fun goes out of their lives.
So many times I’ve sat eating a curry, feeling their eyes devouring my delicious food as they chew sadly on a lettuce leaf.
My friends are just a snapshot of what’s going on in the UK.
A recent study showed the average woman spends 21 years and eight months of her life dieting.
More than one in ten women have been on a diet for the entire past year and only one in three are happy with their weight and body.
It’s so sad. Their whole day can be destroyed if they’ve put on a pound.
Four of my mates are on trendy weight-loss drug Wegovy, spending £170 a month privately as they wouldn’t qualify on the NHS.
At least one of them lies online, adding 5st to her weight so she can get the medication.
When a group of us went on holiday recently, one pal was miserable the whole time because she was convinced she was gaining weight, despite looking fantastic.
I’m relieved I’ve left that destructive way of thinking behind.
My weight no longer governs my life — in fact, I have no idea what it is, as I’ve banned scales from my house.
I used to weigh myself constantly — first thing in the morning then again and again during the day.
If I got home from work and found I’d gained weight, I’d have soup or skip supper.
WOBBLY LEGS
But now I’ve embraced my squidgy bits and I’m happier than ever.
If I put on a dress and it’s a little snug, I just find one in my wardrobe that does fit, as I’ve got clothes from sizes 16 to 20.
I love every part of my body — even if my legs wobble and I have cellulite.
It has carried my two children, Aleecia, 19, and Mikey, 14, it allows me to walk and dance, and it fights off infection.
It’s amazing and I’m grateful for it.
In my teens and early twenties I was naturally slim.
When I had my daughter at the age of 22, I bounced back into shape within weeks.
But in 2009 I was diagnosed with a thyroid condition and soon started to put on a bit of weight.
In 2010, aged 27, I had my son and I put on 2st, going from 11st to 13st. And I just couldn’t shift it.
Suddenly, I hated my body, and seven years of yo-yo dieting followed.
I tried every weight-loss regime going.
The other women all praised me for my self-control, but inside I was miserable and hungry
Danielle Broadbent
I did the Cambridge diet and lost 10lbs in a week on soup and shakes.
But I soon put it all back on.
At the time I was working in telesales and the office had a very anti-fat ethos.
If I had a baked potato with chilli and cheese for lunch, they’d say, “Are you going to eat all of that and still have tea?”
One day, we went to Pizza Hut to celebrate hitting our targets.
Keen to fit in I drank Diet Coke and ate salad.
The other women all praised me for my self-control, but inside I was miserable and hungry.
It’s crazy that depriving myself was being celebrated.
I remember dieting like mad before my 30th birthday.
I was surviving on soups and shakes and barely saw my children as I would go straight from work to the gym.
For weeks I was hungry and snappy, but when the size 12 pink dress I had bought for the party fitted, it was a real highlight.
‘SO MUCH MORE CONTENT’
It didn’t last though, and the yo-yo dieting started again.
Then, in 2018, I agreed to go on a body- confidence-boosting Channel 4 show called Naked Beach.
During filming I had intensive therapy and mentoring and learnt to embrace my body for what it could do, not what it looked like.
My turning point came while talking to one of the mentors, Dan Richards, who had lost an arm in a freak accident.
I was crying about my spare tyres and there he was, comforting ME.
I felt embarrassed that I was so focused on weight when there were more important things going on. It put everything into perspective — it changed my life.
Now I eat without guilt and I listen to my body.
If I want lasagne with garlic bread, that’s what I’ll have.
I don’t eat enormous amounts because then I feel uncomfortable, but I enjoy whatever I do eat.
I swim regularly because it’s good for my mental health.
I’m so much more content now I’m not governed by my dress size and I’m happy I have no idea how much I weigh.
But even dress sizes can put some of my friends in a spin.
I’m happier than I ever imagined now I’ve accepted the body I have and I want my friends to have the same freedom
Danielle Broadbent
Recently I went shopping with one and she stormed out of the store because a size 12 didn’t fit her.
I didn’t find it offensive that she was so upset in front of me, a size 16.
And I also don’t mind when they start pinching non-existent bits of fat and showing me how they’ve put on weight.
I get it, I was once the same.
My partner of 18 years, Mike, 39, who works for the council and has a gardening business, loves me whatever my size and has always supported me.
But our relationship is better because I’m happier and our sex life has improved too, as I’m more confident and don’t mind being naked in front of him any more.
And I’m a better mum, because by being happy and confident, I’m being a good role model for my children.
Unlike some of my friends, I don’t do things I hate to stay thin.
Some of them go to the gym twice a day and tell me they hate it.
My answer — don’t go.
Find exercise you love.
I’m happier than I ever imagined now I’ve accepted the body I have and I want my friends to have the same freedom.
I tell them constantly, but they mostly sigh and roll their eyes these days.
Hopefully another woman reading this will see the light.