‘I’ve got to call it out’ mum says daughter cried for 2 days after being excluded from school pal’s birthday sleepover
A MUM has sparked a fierce debate after raging about her daughter being left out of a school friend’s birthday celebrations.
Amber’s “heartbroken” 10-year-old was left crying for “two days” after she and one other girl weren’t invited to the birthday sleepover.
In a video on her TikTok page, Amber insisted: “If your kid is going to have a birthday party or a sleepover, in my opinion you invite the whole class.
“If you can’t afford to invite the whole class then you don’t invite no one.
“My daughter’s been in her bedroom for two days absolutely sobbing, she’s literally heartbroken.
“All her friends are at this sleepover and her and one other girl isn’t.”
She went on to insist that it’s the “parents’ responsibility” to ensure that no-one is left out, adding: “If the children say ‘But I don’t want her to come’, you have a word with your kids.
“You say, ‘No everyone comes or no one comes’ because that is the right thing to do and children don’t get hurt.
“Honestly that to me is not okay. It is so not okay.”
The video quickly attracted comments from other parents weighing in, with one writing: “Don’t be ridiculous.
“Teach your child to be resilient, she won’t always be included in everything and you shouldn’t have raised her to expect to be.
“How silly!”
“I ain’t paying for peoples kids I don’t like, don’t care who’s crying!” another raged.
“No. If it’s my child’s birthday, they get to invite who they want there,” a third insisted.
“It’s a part of life unfortunately.” someone else said.
“My child invites who she wants.
“If one child is left out, that’s tough!”
Amber then returned to TikTok to share another video in which she further explained the situation, while slamming some of the “disgusting” comments she had received on the video.
My view as a mum of two
Amber kicked off a fierce debate with her TikTok reaction to her daughter being left out of a friend’s birthday sleepover, as she said that the 10-year-old had been crying in her room for two days.
Like Amber’s daughter, my children also go to a small village school.
In fact, my son, who is now 10, was one of just five boys when he started his primary school journey.
And if he came home saying that his friends had all been invited to a classmate’s party but he hadn’t, I wouldn’t stand for that.
While I understand that funds are tight for many of us during the cost of living crisis, I do agree with Amber that if it’s a case of not having enough money or space, then a different birthday celebration should be considered.
Why not take just one friend to the cinema and make that the birthday celebration?
Or see if there’s someone else in the class with a similar birthday that you could team up with for a joint party you could invite everyone to.
There are multiple ways around this – and they’re all solutions that won’t leave anyone heartbroken.
By Fabulous Online Senior Digital Reporter and mum-of-two Sarah Bull
And speaking to Fabulous Online, Amber said that the issue had arisen because her daughter is in a tiny school year – 7 girls and 8 boys.
But when organising the sleepover, the birthday girl had decided to invite just five of the girls.
“I have always invited the whole class if it was a hall or house party.” Amber said.
“And if it’s a more expensive venue then I would just bring two close friends – if it’s a sleepover I would invite the whole friendship group.”
When she spoke to the mum after uploading the video, she told her that she “didn’t have the funds, or space, to have all the girls and she wished I had spoken to her first”.
“I still believe with parties some children get left out over and over again and I think it can be really damaging to children’s mental health,” Amber insisted.
“I really believe at young primary school age all the children should be invited, and if parents can’t afford all the children then maybe do a cheaper party.”
As for those who had said they wouldn’t be able to invite the whole class because of its size, Amber said she wasn’t suggesting that.
“There are correct ways of inviting kids – either a small friendship group is fine or all the boys and all the girls,” she said.
“But just picking a whole class and leaving out two children in my opinion is cruel.”
Amber concluded by saying that her daughter is well aware that she won’t be invited to everything, but it “still upset her”.
“There are grown men on my post that have said not being invited to parties has stuck with them until this day,” she pointed out.