US condemned over airdrop of omelette MREs to Gaza
GAZA — The United Nations has issued a scathing condemnation of what it describes as an "inhumane act" perpetrated by the United States over the recent air dropping of Menu #4 Cheese and Veggie Omelet Meals Ready-to-Eat (MREs) over the Gaza Strip, a move that has sparked outrage and incredulity on the international stage.
"We cannot stand idly by while the basic rights and tastes of Palestinians are trampled upon," said Gaza resident Ahmed Abadi. "The international community must hold those responsible for this gastronomic affront accountable."
The Israeli Defense Forces (IDF), an organization that has a unique way of solving hunger problems, refrained from launching airstrikes on the gathering of people collecting the MREs. Sources within the IDF purportedly indicated that they deemed the act of consuming the omelet MREs to be more torturous than death itself, leading them to exercise what they called "culinary compassion."
The UN's condemnation echoed these sentiments, with Secretary-General António Guterres describing the airdrop as "tantamount to culinary warfare." Meanwhile, U.S. officials have adopted the official policy of “beggars can’t be choosers,” insisting that they were chosen based on cultural considerations and economics rather than any malicious intent. Vasily Nebenzya, the Russian UN representative, took a rare stance of solidarity and insisted “he would rather eat a HIMARs round than that [MRE].”
As tensions continue to simmer over the controversial airdrop, one thing remains clear: the omelet MREs that rained down on Gaza may have left a bitter taste in the mouths of many.
Mr. Scorpio is a contributing writer to Duffel Blog, follow @_MrScorpio on X (formerly Twitter) for SWO hateposting and other Navy nonsense. You probably work with them. Look over your shoulder, there I am. See, I’m waving, don’t be rude Kevin and come talk to me. Also, update your NFAAS.