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2024

DON'T KID YOURSELF, BEATING WOLVES WAS BIG

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Arsenal hit the runway tarmac with a clunky landing, but the passengers still cheered as if they were landing in Magaluf for 10 days of debauchery, slightly miffed at the pre-game Premier League title chatter.

Three points, a solid clean sheet, and a sun-drenched, happy home crowd made it a day of solid returns for Mikel Arteta, despite some of the pre-season turbulence you come to expect.

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The starting XI presented two surprises: Kai Havertz started as the No. 9, and Thomas Partey was part of the midfield trio. Arteta clearly favours the brute force of Kai and still seems to fantasise that Thomas Partey has the legs of 2015. Zinchenko was the preferred left-back, while everyone else fit the pattern of last season.

The 2-0 win was fairly dominant when you look at the numbers—19 shots, 8 on target, and Arsenal had the majority of the possession—but if we’re honest, the game felt like it carried too much jeopardy well into the second half. Wolves were more powerful in midfield for much of the game, and they had openings that didn’t feel reassuring. Watching their forwards drop delicious crosses into the box that found their target made me feel queasy. Seeing their players attempt bicycle kicks was vomit-inducing. Watching Saliba mess up the progression from the back so badly that he handed Cunha an assist on a plate made me run to the bathroom.

But we survived it. Bukayo Saka decided it wouldn’t be a slow start to this season, delivering a delightful header for Kai Havertz and then killing the game with a bit of individual near-post brutality that not many players have in their locker.

That’s what great players do. Saka has had goals, assists, and presence in abundance for the last three years, but yesterday felt a little different. He seemed to be occupying more RCM pockets in the first half, offering more combinations in his attacking play. This performance went well beyond hugging the touchline and looking for 1 vs. 1 openings. He was literally doing Odegaard things—dropping deep, cutting through balls. The levels he reached so soon after the Euros were astonishing. We know he can score goals like the one he produced—but to do it under pressure, when the team was clearly gassed, in the first game of the season... well, I was impressed.

Thomas Partey had quite the 90 minutes. In the first half, he looked pretty decent. He intercepted passes, broke with speed, and created chances. In the second half, he was a bit off the boil. He looked dead on his feet. You could say it was a disaster class. My hope is that these stats tell a good story somewhere:

  • 89% pass completion

  • 4 chances created (only bettered by Saka)

  • 3 ball recoveries

  • 3/3 tackles

  • 3/3 clearances

  • Fouled 3 times

  • Conceded 3 free kicks

...but I’m beginning to worry that the lack of legs is starting to look like a terminal illness in football terms. He might be done at the highest level. His hard fade in the second half has been a theme in 2024. The idea that we have a player who can’t stay fit, and when he is fit, he can’t last... is not fun.

Declan Rice playing in that more advanced left 8 role didn’t really do it for me again. He was a little bit heavy on the ball, and he doesn’t glide in that role the way we need him to. I do wonder if Merino is coming in to take on the LCM, with Declan dropping deeper and covering for a fading Thomas Partey. Our left side was certainly better today—but you feel that Declan has a few more months in that more advanced role before we can state that he’s a better 8 than a 6.

Zinchenko put in a performance out there. Defensively, he was more than decent; offensively, you just can’t deny what he gave us. He was involved in the pre-assist for Havertz and caused plenty of trouble down the left, giving Martinelli some good opportunities to fluff his lines. The most notable part of the game was who came on for him: Jurrier Timber. If you’ve been fighting me on this for 12 months, I feel for you. He entered the mix at a moment when the team (and the crowd) was fading, and he injected life into the game. His heading was great, his dazzling run electrified me like it was Messi, and he had a shot. The man looked like an all-action monster. He’s going to give us some great options this season, and I think he’ll relegate Zinchenko at some point. That said, it’s always great to have two top left-backs.

Shall we talk about Yerson Mosquera? The Colombian had a ‘let’s make it about me’ kind of game. He choke-slammed Kai into the ground after a coming together—the chuckle brothers (Tierney & Gillett) thought the WWE moves weren’t violent enough to merit even a booking. Late in the game, when Gabriel Jesus was putting his boot on...

...Yerson went for an inside cheek cuppage that did not come with consent. You never go there. That’s assault, people. If you did that at a company volleyball match, you’d be hauled in front of the Supreme Court. What happened? Jesus reacted and was yellow-carded (victim blaming). Could VAR not intervene to highlight that there was some non-consensual arse-play at hand here? Wild.

One minor concern was some of our centre-backs. Gabriel looked like he was trying to prove he was smoother on the ball than Calafiori early on. He played two quite poor long balls that didn’t feel necessary. William Saliba also passed his way into quite an average performance that suggested a loss of confidence. It's early days, but both players need to get to grips with this before the Villa game.

Let’s talk about Wolves—they are a very, very well-coached side. They made their presence known. Gary O'Neil has a team that is technically sound, tactically disciplined, and extremely confident. They had a lot of strength in midfield, and there was a 20-minute period where Arsenal looked like they’d been broken. Wolves will trouble some big teams this year, I promise you that. Those three points will look very good come the end of the season.

So overall—here’s where we conclude:

Beating Wolves will be seen as a very good three points as the season progresses.

Arsenal were roughed up by Wolves in the second half. The physical battle in midfield was won by them, and they allowed Wolves to put their hands on them (literally at times) in the second half, which sapped the energy from the stadium. Arteta might have to be sharp with managing fatigue against Villa—if we were playing them, they’d have put two past us.

There were massive performances from Saka and Kai, but muted performances from Saliba, Odegaard, Martinelli, and Declan. Those four are going to have to kick it up a gear in our first away game of the season.

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The Unai Emery cuck brigade will be out in force if we’re beaten at the weekend. No ex-manager has a stronger cult following than the exVillareal manager. A whole collection of misfits who were absolutely desperate for Arteta to fail because of how Arsenal treated Unai. They forget the dreadful football, the meek decisions, the negativity, and the downing of tools from our b-list set of Champions League wannabes. This weekend is their Christmas, because part of my punishment for rounding on him early is he will ALWAYS CAUSE ARSENAL PAIN. Can we not just take advantage of his porous midfield setups and pummel Villa for his misdeeds against us? I hope it’s this weekend. Villa conceded 2.4 xG to a bland West Ham side and won. Let’s hope we drill them.

Ok, that’s me done. If you want the early bird OTW, it’s below. x

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WOLVES - ON THE WHISTLE (LIVE)
Hey everyone, below is the video for the LIVE On The Whistle podcast. Just show up after the game, click play on the video, and you’ll be good to go…
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