I’m a bride & shaming my own wedding guests – I’m salty my mom went behind my back & let my family flout the dress code
AN angry bride has opened up about how her wedding guests flouted her ceremony’s dress code.
Worse, her mother went behind her back to accommodate her sneaky relatives.
Redditor TheNombieNinja shared the wedding drama in a viral post.
“My wedding was a few months ago, and I have finally calmed down enough to share this,” she said.
The bride explained that her ceremony was black tie optional, set at a “gorgeous members-only country club.”
The country club’s contract, she explained, stressed their dress code policy.
“The dress code in the contract is very nondescript, but the two things it does specifically say are ‘No jeans’ and ‘No hats indoors,’ you can probably see where this is going,” she said.
“Because I come from a fairly rural and blue-collar family, I laid out the dress code very plainly.
“I put it on the invitations (which were sent out months early), on the RSVP website page, on the wedding website, and on the FAQ section of the website, which went into the most words on what appropriate attire would be.
“We also got to use the venue at a discount due to family and friend connections on my husband’s side of the family.”
A month before the wedding, however, problems started to arise when she received a text from an aunt.
“She felt it was unfair to ask her boyfriend to buy pants since he only owned jeans; mind you, this man is in his 40s and is a God-fearing man who goes to church every Sunday.
“I explained to her that he would need to at least wear khakis as it was heavily stressed that we needed to follow the dress code, especially with what we were being charged.
“She then continued to ask if they would have someone at the door to turn away guests not dressed appropriately; I told her I didn’t know but reiterated that the contract states that guests are to be dressed a certain way.
“The conversation stops there, and I never get a further response; I thought the discussion ended here, and she got the point to just tell her boyfriend to run to Walmart to pick up khakis.”
However, a week before the wedding, her mother called to say that wasn’t the case.
Honestly, in the end, if that’s the biggest salt I have about my wedding, then I’m lucky because, at the end of the day, I married the love of my life, and that’s all that matters.
Redditor TheNombieNinja
“I got a call from my mother saying she had been talking with the event coordinator at the wedding venue, and great news: guests can wear jeans!” she said.
“[She] continued saying she didn’t want me to feel like she went behind my back in doing this SPOILER that is literally what she did.
“She claimed my aunt and her boyfriend weren’t going to come to the wedding if they couldn’t wear jeans; if they had told me that, I would have told them not to come as they can’t follow directions and couldn’t be bothered to threaten me themselves.”
On the day of the ceremony, her brother informs her that her family has continued to break the dress code.
“My brother comes to tell me that not only are my aunt and her boyfriend in jeans, [but] so is the rest of that side of the family, many of whom had to be asked to take their hats off indoors,” she said.
“Honestly, in the end, if that’s the biggest salt I have about my wedding, then I’m lucky because, at the end of the day, I married the love of my life, and that’s all that matters.”
“The sad part is that prior to going to college, she was my favorite aunt. Since then, her behavior at family events has been less than to be desired,” she added.
People were shocked by her family’s inability to follow directions.
“Wtf? Go to a second-hand store, borrow something from a friend or relative… ‘Nonjeans’ is not a big ask,” said one commenter.
“It’s ridiculous! Especially when you know they could go to Walmart or Target and get A PAIR of trousers for $10 if they wanted. They were just being stubborn and rude. Well done, OP, for keeping your cool!” agreed another.
“Non-jeans shouldn’t even be an ASK for a wedding. That’s just basic wedding dress code,” said a third.
Some thought that her aunt’s reaction to the dress code was pre-meditated.
“The fact that almost everyone from your side wore jeans shows that this somehow became a huge ‘protest,'” said one commenter.
“A ‘How dare the rich people tell us what to wear.’ While your aunt and her boyfriend were part of the problem, your mother talked to the event coordinator without talking to you. And a bunch of your family wore hats as well as jeans.
“Almost like the whole family were thumbing their nose at the married couple and their wishes,” they added.
“I would just send a gift — possibly a nice gift certificate to whatever store aunt’s boyfriend buys his jeans at — and send my regrets that I won’t be able to go to the wedding.”
“I think they are attempting to be socially rebellious. I’ve seen people (especially from lower economic backgrounds) get very angry when asked to follow a dress code as if they are being asked to pretend to be something they are not,” agreed another.
“I wouldn’t be surprised if the rest of the family had a similar line of thinking since they wore casual clothing too despite knowing where and what event [it] will be.”